Post Cardiff City

*We join the lads celebrating their victory over Cardiff City,
MON is doing Snoopy's "Happy Dance"*

MON: Yippee! We did it again lads. Another clean sheet any more and we'll put Dunelm out of business! And Gabby you don't half like those goals do you?

*The lads all look at Gabby expectedly*

Gabby: Indubitably.

*the team looks confused*

Gabby: I like goals?

*The lads cheer, Gabby replaces his monacle and reverts to reading Tolsty's War and Peace*

MON: Now where's my lovely, lovely defenders?

*MON looks left, he looks right ... They're nowhere to be found*

Young: They all went to the bathroom a while back boss.

*MON opens the bathroom door to find Collins, Cuellar and Dunne staring intently in the mirror straining*

MON: What in the world!?

Dunne: Hello dere bass, we're having a beard growing competition. Beards are tha life's blood of defending and masculinity don't ya know.

MON: But ... You're all clean shaven.

*MON blinks*

MON: Heavens alive!!

*Cuellar sports a thick bushy beard much like Harry Potter's Hagrid, Dunne sports a long silky viking beard, Collin's combs out his ginger afro beard with an afro comb with a fist on the handle*

*Davies rolls in on a wheelchair*

Davies: Hi guys! Another clean sheet huh?

*The successful defenders shun Davies, Collins turns over his shoulder still combing out his beard*

Collins: Why are you in a wheelchair? I thought you hurt your shoulder.

Davies: Oh yeah.

*Davies stands up*

Davies: So guys can I join in?

*Davies strains . . . He manages a wispy, patchy moustash. The other defenders all laugh*

Cuellar: Luke at that pathetic excuse for a moustash!

Collins: His sideburns haven't even passed his earlobes!

*The defenders fallabout laughing, Davies runs out crying*