*We Join the lads returning to the dressing room after victory over Fulham*
Milner: Reet ... so this time we wun, did we win proppa like?
Young: Yeah, I've explained this to you already James...
Milner: Jimmy Ashley man, Jimmy, like Jimmy Nail like.
Young: Fine "Jimmy" we lost on away goals before, this was a league match.
Milner: Reet ...Carlos what'cha up to like?
Cuellar: Och I'm emptyin' tha Fulham pleers out me pockets laddie.
*Milner stares blankly at Cuellar and turns to Cuellars interpreter*
Interpreter: He's emptying the Fulham players out of his pockets.
Milner: Ah OK.
Kamara: Flippin' heck it was hot in there.
Nevland: I have chewing gum stuck to my face and pocket fluff in my throat.
Clark: Wow, it was really great to play with you Mr.Cuellar can you give me some tips on defending.
Cuellar: Aye laddie, grow ya'self a mighty beard.
Interpreter: Grow a beard.
(Clark frowns and strokes his baby smooth chin)
Clark: But I'm 19, I can't grow a proper beard...
Cuellar: When I were 19 I had 2 beards!
Interpreter: Whan he was 19....
Clark: I heard what he said!
*Clark grabs his bag and runs off crying to the toilets*
*MON enters, the room falls silent*
MON: I've done it again lads, I'm a genius. What a great idea of mine to keep the 4-5-1 and injure Curtis.
Davies: You didn't injure me boss.
MON: Didn't I Curtis? Didn't I?
Davies: No
MON: Didn't I?
Davies: No
MON: Well fine whatever, the point is we won and that was down to me, me and my brilliant new tactic.... What's that buzzing noise?
*Clark emerges from the toilet, the team gasp with surprise*
MON: Ciaran .... Have you shaved your head and stuck the hair to your face with shower gel?
Clark: Yes boss, yes I have.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment