*We join the lads celebrating their 4-2 victory over Pompey, champagne is popping and horns are playing on the coach which is sitting outside Fratton Park*
Heskey: Get Up!
All the lads: Get on up!
Heskey: Get Up!
All the lads: Get on up!
Heskey: Get on the scene!
All the lads: Get on up!
Heskey: I'm a goal machine!
*Heskey does a dance (including a spin and "jumping into the splits") in the aisle of the coach*
All the lads: Yay! Go Heskey! Go Heskey....
MON: Lads, lads calm down. Great win out there tonight. Nice to see my boys Emile and Stilyan getting on the scoresheet.
*MON tussles Heskey and Petrovs hair*
Young: Stan's was an own goal boss.
MON: Well it's like they say "they all count" and Emile is growing into the 20 a season striker I knew he was, if we can just tap his potential in the coming years...
Young: Potential? He must be 40 boss!
MON: Look if Fergie's lads are "kids" at 22 then my young gun Emile still has plenty of time to come good.
*Emile nods, Young sighs*
MON: and Stuart, what a great full debut. You can't ask more from than a debutant than to score a goal.
Downing: I suppose I could've scored two like.
MON: Yes, well don't be hard on yourself.
Downing: Or it woulda been reet good if I coulda scored a hat trick it wor my second match and that.
Coach Driver: Like me!
*The coach driver removes his hat*
All the lads: Dion Dublin!?
Dublin: Yeah, what can I say I love Villa .... And driving coaches.
MON: Well it was a great performance Stuart, so you can take that with you.
*Downing begins sobbing*
Downing: It weren't even on tha telly or owt man.
MON: Look, I admire your professionalism but ....
*MON is interrupted by Delph bursting through the coach doors*
Delph: Boss, boss the papers are saying we're going to sign Jermaine Pennant!
MON: They're saying what!?
*MON cocks a shotgun and puts a hand on Dublin's shoulder*
MON: Lets ride!
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